⛰️ #4 | How to Complain the Right Way

How to Complain the Right Way

It is human nature to constantly be in the midst of a turmoil of dissatisfaction, complaints, and objections to what life brings us, and other times, feeling full of bliss and contentment.

However, the former is usually what we tend to focus on, and hence what we express the most passionately, whether it be to our friends, families, a random stranger at the bus stop, or your well-worn journal (bless that bundle of paper).

Let’s be real, we’ve all ranted to someone about that one abhorrent professor, or our unforgiving boss, or a neighbor that just doesn’t understand the concept of basic sound transmission, and the list goes on…

And for me, and I’m sure is the case with many, there often comes the guilt during these lower times, labeling it as a blaring sign of ungratefulness. That the synonym of having complaints is ingratitude.

But that made me think: if having times of overwhelm or grievances are so common, does that mean every time we go through these phases, we are demonstrating ingratitude?

And I found the answer in the Quran, as I read through the stories of Maryam (RA), Nuh (AS), Yaqub (AS), and so many others. All of these honorable individuals did not hide their pain from the One that Hears and Sees everything; rather they sought comfort in His presence and called out to Him with their problems and tests.

It was in this particular ayah in Surah Yusuf, that the solution was nestled in, where Allah recounts the story of Yaqub (AS), His servant, who, while grieving the loss of his son, says:

{قَالَ إِنَّمَآ أَشْكُوا۟ بَثِّى وَحُزْنِىٓ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ وَأَعْلَمُ مِنَ ٱللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعْلَمُونَ}

“I only complain of my suffering and my grief to Allah, and I know from Allah that which you do not know.” (Yusuf 12:86)

There it is. In the beautiful example of a righteous slave of God, we see the answer.

Rather than berating ourselves for being unable to be whole-heartedly grateful for hardships and pain, we accept the test for what it is, and understand that Allah acknowledges our perseverance and struggle, and He knows that it is not easy. In fact, we should exemplify this understanding through complaining TO Allah.

There is nowhere in the stories of the Quran where Allah admonishes the servants who turn to him with their lamentations, problems, and complaints. He embraces our call with His light and knowledge. He already knows what is in our hearts. So why are we afraid to tell Him?

Why is it so easy to complain to people about God?

If we switch the norm to complaining TO God about the tests we face in this world, how much lighter our souls will feel!

When we let out our concerns, worries, and anguish through the remembrance of Allah, our minds will feel that comfort, and will allow our hearts to feel the contentment we desire.

Don’t be afraid to complain to Allah. He will listen, and our hearts will be open, a perfect harbor for the ship of guidance and ease.

This isn’t to say that we cannot talk about our problems with others. It is extremely important to have a close circle of grounded individuals who you know will listen to you with compassion, and advise you with intentions rooted in the understanding that Allah is the Greatest of Planners.

But remember, we all struggle and we all have complaints. But we also all have Allah to turn to, with His radiant Light ready to embrace you with all the darkness you feel you are carrying.

Your complaints do not dull the Light of Allah.

InshaAllah, with every word of remembrance as we talk to Him, our souls will brighten and pave the way of conviction, contentment, and clarity.